So now we come to the second part of my Warming Up series. I’ve already discussed what foreplay is, or what my personal definition of it is, this post is meant as sort of a rough guideline of possible foreplay activities. Most of this has been drawn from my own personal experience so your mileage may vary. This isn’t meant as an instructional guide on foreplay, merely offering my methods to see if you find anything you might want as an addition to your warm up repertoire.
In warming up for vaginal penetration
In warming up for vaginal penetration, there are a couple of things I’ll do differently depending on whether I’m preparing for PiV sex or if I’m planning on penetrating myself with a dildo. With a partner, I enjoy giving and receiving oral to get ourselves physically and mentally ready. Personally speaking, giving my partner a blowjob before sex makes me feel incredibly sensual and sometimes gets me aroused enough for penetration all on its own. Being able to control the experience my partner receives isn’t something I get to feel when I get fucked, so I relish the control I have for the time being.
Because my partner values reciprocity, he’s often not the only one getting oral. In fact, even with the difference in our sizes, we’ve actually pulled off the 69 position to great success. Getting oral is a fantastic act in its own right, and for some people it may be the whole sexual encounter , but I often find it to be an amazing warm up for PiV with my wonderful partner. When receiving oral, I prefer to also be fingered at the same time. The internal stimulation and getting used to being penetrated makes it so I can enjoy feeling stretched by my partner without feeling claustrophobic from his dick. I know it seems strange that my vagina with size queen tendencies can feel claustrophobic from anything, but it remains the case. If I don’t warm up to penetration and I’m not turned on enough, it’ll hurt.
If I’m warming up for a solo session, I’ll often start off with a vibrator. I’ve got a few that have been featured so far, namely the much loved Turbo Glider and Mystic Wand. Warming up my clit turns me on and gets me ready for a dildo. Now, I should use a smaller dildo in preparation for my larger ones, but most times? I just go straight for it and endure a little discomfort as my body gets used to it. In this respect, I would ask my readers to please use smaller dildos to warm up first rather than just plunging in. Your orifices will thank you.
The last crucial piece for warming up is: LUBE. I cannot stress enough how essential a good lube has been for my sex and masturbation life. Good Clean Love’s original formula was my go to until I noticed I started having some irritation, so I discontinued use. Thankfully, Good Clean Love has graciously offered to send me their BioNude formula, which I’m very grateful for. In the meantime, I ordered both the Butters and Sliquid from Peepshow, which preliminary testing is showing some very good results! Of course, I’ll fill you in more on a later post with regards to how these lubes feel.
In warming up for anal play
So a quick disclaimer: I’ve not had penetrative anal sex yet. Well, I’ve had an entire 8 inch dick in my ass, but after insertion (we didn’t use lube) it got pretty uncomfortable so he pulled out and we moved on to something else. So most of my experience with anal has been using toys or getting my ass fingered. Regardless, here’s how I warm up.
Usually I start with lots of lube and gentle digital penetration, because my butt is a delicate flower. The few times I’ve been impatient, I’ve wound up bleeding slightly and had to take a long break from anal play of any kind. So if I’m doing anything with my butt, I make some time to read some erotica, stimulate my clit, and slowly ease into anal. Making sure my clit is involved ensures that I’m turned on enough and still feeling pleasure while I’m easing into anal.
I’ve also done an enema in preparation for anal, though I later wasn’t able to actually follow through on that desire. I’ve done an enema using a bulb, and while I did feel cleaner, I felt oddly dehydrated and headachey afterward. This bad feeling nipped any chance of sex in the bud, so my partner and I ended up just snuggling while I recovered. So if you’re planning on doing an enema, I’d recommend: 1. Doing several rinses. 2. Making sure you’ve got access to a bathroom you can hog for about an hour. 3. Drinking plenty of water in the event you feel like me after. Also, while an enema once in a while is fine, too many too close together can really upset your gut flora! So be mindful and take care of your body.
You know your body best and know where your limits are. The things I’ve described above may work for you, and they may not. I encourage you to experiment with several activities and to take your time in getting your body ready. In a lot of ways, warming up for sex is like warming up for any other athletic event. Take your time to get your mind and body ready so that you can enjoy whatever encounter you decide to participate in!