In the course of my reviewing career, I have reviewed fantastical mermaids, zombie penises, dildos that look like nothing in particular and dildos that more resemble abstract art than the human phallus. Put simply, I haven’t seen a realistic dildo since starting reviewing, and until recently owned exactly one dildo that could claim to be realistic. But ever since SheVibe took me on their reviewer program, I’ve had the chance to expand my sexual horizons by asking for…a dildo that looks like a penis, aka the Fuze Major. Listen, this is BRAIN-BREAKINGLY funny to me. Having more experience with silicone unicorn horns than penises? OF COURSE THIS WOULD BE MY LIFE.
Anyway, in attempting to broaden my horizons so to speak, I asked SheVibe to send me the Fuze Major, an uncut suction cup dildo. It’s a petite thing compared to the monster dildos that comprise my usual fare, but for most people it would probably fall in the average range. At 6 1/4 inches in length and around 1.5 inches in thickness, the Major has dimensions that would most likely be found on a cis man. The Fuze Major also fairly emulates what an uncut cis man might look like, which for some will be a serious draw and for others a major turn off. For my own tastes, I love the foreskin on this toy which is why I asked for it. Uncut toys are something of a rarity and having the chance to own one was something I jumped on!
Using this toy however, required adjusting my expectations. I’ve been wooed by the soft and squishy dual density toys of late, so I was a little surprised when I gave the Major a squeeze and it didn’t squish. Like the Hollywood vision of military personnel, the Major is firm and fairly inflexible, but its average size makes it so that it can be used after just a little fingering. Sliding it in, I couldn’t feel the foreskin as much as I could the veiny texture of the shaft. That was a little disappointing as I was hoping to really feel it! But the shape of the head was bulbous and pronounced enough that I could feel it on my G-spot. It excelled as both a static and thrusting dildo, and I really enjoyed clenching around it as I gorged my eyes on porn and put the Exposed Nocturnal on my clit. I find myself reaching for it when I want to fantasize about fucking someone uncut, though it hasn’t exactly revolutionized anything in terms of shape or squish. The aesthetics of the Major are really attractive to me
Also, the suction cup is nothing to sneeze at. Once I stuck it to my headboard, it hung out there for the whole day. To go to sleep, I had to yank it off the headboard because it otherwise WOULD NOT FALL OFF. Kudos Fuze, this is a powerful suction cup!
The moment I really want to talk about though, was the time I used it in my harness. As I slid the Major through the O-ring, I marveled at how attractive it looked on me. Looking at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t stop staring at the perky Major bobbing from my pelvis. I lubed up and jacked off my artificial erection, hypnotized by the babe in the mirror who was stroking her cock along with me. I felt an erotic flush slowly creep over my body as I watched my self in the mirror. And when I slipped in the Exposed Nocturnal to vibrate my clit while I jerked off? It was confusing, erotic and thrilling all at the same time and I found myself quickly working towards orgasm. I’ve sometimes had fantasies of having my own dick and the Major is what I imagine it would look like if I grew one rather than used a store bought one. Since that episode I’ve been fantasizing non-stop about hot strap-on sex with more than just the Major; visions of fucking someone with the Splendid, Frank’s Monster and the Vamp dance through my head…mmm thanks Major, you’ve opened my eyes.
This is a dildo for people who like average sized dildos that are fairly firm and offer a nice amount of G-spot stimulation. This dildo is also for people who prefer more realistic style dildos and have been aching for some intact representation! This is a fantasy dildo not in the sense that it belongs on a fantasy creature, but that it fulfills the fantasy of fucking or bearing an uncut member. For someone who fantasizes about either, the Major is a dildo worthy of consideration.
This product was sent to me free of charge in exchange for my honest review. Thanks SheVibe!